WEBVTT

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..:: Presented By ZarFilm Website ::..
‏.::  www.bolboljan.net ::.

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Welcome! Welcome!

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Congrats, Drac.

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Holy smokes,
everybody's here.

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Mr. and Mrs. Loughran,
the parents of the groom, and family.

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Mom and Dad!
Johnny!

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I can't believe
you're all here.

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Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah!

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Yo, how hot is my date?

00:02:39.857 --> 00:02:41.626
So hot. Wow.

00:02:41.693 --> 00:02:43.061
How 'bout how hot mine is?

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You got a date?

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Yeah. She's invisible.
That's why you can't see her.

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Oh, right. This is
the one from "Canada"?

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Wedding's starting.

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Ah!

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Oh!

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Aw!

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Whoo-hoo!

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Great.

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True. So true, Marty.

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Aw!

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Aw. How sweet.

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Oh, my. Look at you.

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Oh, my gosh.

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Oh.

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Is it everything you wanted,
my little poisonberry?

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Oh, it is, Daddy.

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Except where's Grandpa Vlad?

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Honey, your gramps
would not have been cool with this.

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He's old-school.

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How do we know?
If he could just meet Johnny...

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He would have eaten him.

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He's not as
enlightened as your hip Daddy.

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So, you're really okay
with him not being a monster?

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Human, monster, unicorn,
as long as you're happy.

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Thanks, Dad.

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<i>♪ And you'll always ♪
♪ be my moonlight ♪</i>

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<i>♪ But now on ♪
♪ wings of love you soar ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Now that ♪
♪ you're Johnny's girl ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Johnny's girl ♪</i>

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<i>♪ And kind of Daddy's, too ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Your mom would be so happy ♪</i>

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<i>♪ 'Cause she always knew ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Love is making room ♪
♪ for all the best in you ♪</i>

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Hey, Dad.

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Oh, hey, guys!

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Todd, take a break.

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So, what's up?

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Mavis was wondering if maybe you
wanted to go for a fly.

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Oh. We haven't done that in forever.
Any special reason?

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No special reason at all.

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Right, Mavey?

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What's his deal?

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He's silly.

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It's just a beautiful
night, and...

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Well, if you don't want to...

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No, no! Are you kidding?

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I would eat a bucket of
garlic to fly with you.

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Oh, honey,
look at those fluffy clouds.

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Remember what we played
when you were little?

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Hide and Go
Seek Sharp Objects?

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Okay.
Regular Hide and Go Seek.

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Where are you?

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Honeybat!

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Mavey!

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Honeybat!

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I'm gonna get you.

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Honey? Are you okay?

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Yes.
It's just a little harder

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to catch my breath
since I'm pregnant.

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Yes, well, I guess
that would make it more...

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What?

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I'm gonna be a grandpa!

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And I'm gonna be a dad!

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<i>♪ 'Cause you're ♪
♪ Daddy's girl, or boy ♪</i>

00:08:09.286 --> 00:08:12.156
<i>♪ Daddy's girl, or boy ♪</i>

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I'm hungry again, honey.

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Can you get me
some ice cream with anchovies?

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No, no, no. You mustn't give
in to your cravings.

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It's not good for the baby.

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You need to increase
your spider intake,

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so he'll be able to
climb ceilings properly.

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And eat lots of sheep bile.

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I love you,
Dad, but we don't even know

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if the kid's
gonna be a vampire.

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I'd be thrilled if the baby's human-y,
just like Johnny.

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"Human-y." With thousands
of years of Dracula genes.

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Not gonna happen.

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As long as the baby's healthy.

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Of course.
A healthy little vampire.

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Or human.

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Yes, a human who can
fly as a bat.

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Here. Just have
some monster ball soup.

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It's your mommy's recipe.

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Aw!

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Thank you, Dad.

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Just like you made it when I was a kid.
My favorite.

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Sorry.

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Sir, only the father is allowed
in the delivery room.

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Really? I mean, okay.

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He's the family, I guess.

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Oh, look!
It's a boy! It's a boy!

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The Dracula
bloodline carries on!

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No one will ever harm you
as long as I'm here,

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my little devil dog.

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Dad, can I hold my baby?

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If I were Dad, I'd say yes.

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But I'm the nurse, Francine.

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Here you go anyway.

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My bad.

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Little Dennis is
a year old now. Wow!

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Nice. Yeah. Cute kid.

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Okay, time for presents, guys.

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All right!
Let's do this boy up!

00:10:38.202 --> 00:10:40.271
Check out what I got him.
Bling!

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Wow. Is it cursed?

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Super cursed.
Only the best.

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Straight from the crypt.

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He's just starting to walk,
so maybe it's heavier than...

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Oh. You're okay, Denisovich.

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His name is Dennis.
Named after my father.

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It's not his vampire name.

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My little
Denisovichy-Weesovichy.

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Huh!
Are we sure he's a vampire?

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I mean,
not that it's a bad thing,

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but shouldn't he have fangs
and that pasty skin you guys have?

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Technically, you have until you're five
to get your vampire fangs.

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Oh, he'll get his fangs.
He's a Dracula.

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He's also half Loughran.

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Maybe he'd be better off where we live.
There's more humans there.

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What? Look how well he's playing
with the wolf pups.

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We have a present.
I hope it's acceptable.

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"My First Guillotine."

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Very educational.
Well played, Frank.

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It's great. Thank you.
We just have to baby-proof that.

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Johnny, do you know
where you put the rubber guards?

00:11:47.271 --> 00:11:49.106
Baby-proofing a guillotine?

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So you cut your finger off.
It's part of the fun.

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She made me
baby-proof the whole hotel.

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Someone's overprotective.

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Aah!

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Hmm?

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Johnny! Come quick!

00:12:27.311 --> 00:12:29.146
What's up? He's okay?

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Dennis said his first word!

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He did?

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Come on, honey.
Say it again.

00:12:34.552 --> 00:12:35.553
Bleh, bleh-bleh.

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I don't say,
"Bleh, bleh-bleh."

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We didn't say you did.

00:12:42.293 --> 00:12:43.333
Then where did
he get that?

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Bleh, bleh-bleh.

00:12:44.729 --> 00:12:46.997
Well, maybe sometimes you say it.

00:12:47.064 --> 00:12:49.066
I only say it when I
say I don't say it!

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Bleh, bleh-bleh.

00:12:51.135 --> 00:12:53.571
Okay, kid.
We get it. You can talk.

00:12:55.106 --> 00:12:56.807
Denisovich.

00:12:58.109 --> 00:12:59.510
Dad.

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Just checking for cavities.

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Bleh, bleh-bleh.

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Bleh, bleh-bleh.

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It was you!

00:13:19.797 --> 00:13:20.965
Oh, my goodness, Leonard.

00:13:21.031 --> 00:13:22.900
If you really
looked that hideous,

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I don't think I
could hang out with you.

00:13:24.802 --> 00:13:26.337
Guys, what's the deal?

00:13:26.404 --> 00:13:29.306
Is this a party?
Pick up a phone.

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I don't care if Johnny said it's a
"cool app." Johnny's still new here.

00:13:34.645 --> 00:13:37.948
Now, Porridge Head, did you call a hearse
for the Gremlinbergs?

00:13:38.015 --> 00:13:41.452
No, you're checking
your Facebook page. Again.

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Drac, I told the
guys social media

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is the best way to
promote the hotel.

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Right, Clifton?

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So, Drac, I wanted
to go through some thoughts I had,

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as your new human relations
coordinating co-assistant.

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Sure. It's a real job.

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Not a cheap excuse to keep Mavis happy,
so you never leave here.

00:13:57.835 --> 00:14:00.404
Right. So,
I was thinking,

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since we have so many humans now,
maybe update some of the acts?

00:14:04.508 --> 00:14:05.910
Like, maybe the magician?

00:14:05.976 --> 00:14:07.978
What's wrong with
Harry Three-Eye?

00:14:08.045 --> 00:14:11.182
Well, he might be
a little old-school for the humans.

00:14:11.248 --> 00:14:13.250
Tell me,
sir, what was your card?

00:14:13.317 --> 00:14:14.785
The three of spades?

00:14:16.754 --> 00:14:18.956
Is this your card, my friend?

00:14:19.723 --> 00:14:20.891
Whoa!

00:14:22.860 --> 00:14:24.662
No, Harry's great.

00:14:24.728 --> 00:14:26.864
Can't blame Harry
for the crowd not being hip.

00:14:26.931 --> 00:14:29.033
Okay, what about Wayne?

00:14:29.099 --> 00:14:30.701
Wayne? Are you nuts?
He's my boy.

00:14:30.768 --> 00:14:32.670
Then maybe something
other than tennis?

00:14:32.736 --> 00:14:34.872
Okay, so, what you wanna do

00:14:34.939 --> 00:14:38.409
is lift the racket right on impact, so
you get that nice top spin.

00:14:38.476 --> 00:14:39.944
Try and hit one.

00:14:48.786 --> 00:14:51.722
What is that? What's the noise?
It's on me!

00:14:51.789 --> 00:14:53.691
It's just the cell phone I got you.

00:14:53.757 --> 00:14:56.760
Clifton's sending you a text
so you can practice how to write back.

00:14:56.827 --> 00:14:57.995
Oh!

00:14:59.463 --> 00:15:00.731
Eh...

00:15:00.798 --> 00:15:01.999
What the...
It's not doing it.

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I got it.

00:15:08.606 --> 00:15:09.707
Now you can text Clifton.

00:15:10.708 --> 00:15:12.009
All right, fine.

00:15:13.310 --> 00:15:14.778
How do you do this?

00:15:14.845 --> 00:15:15.966
Maybe it's your fingernails.

00:15:16.013 --> 00:15:18.415
It's easy.
Look. I'll text Mavis.

00:15:18.482 --> 00:15:21.352
Psyched for date night.

00:15:21.418 --> 00:15:23.687
See? And now look, she texted right back.

00:15:23.754 --> 00:15:25.890
"Gotta cancel.
Can't leave Dennis."

00:15:26.490 --> 00:15:27.825
Okay.

00:15:27.892 --> 00:15:32.563
Are we never
allowed to be alone again?

00:15:32.630 --> 00:15:36.433
I need to feel loved, too.

00:15:36.500 --> 00:15:39.236
And send.

00:15:39.303 --> 00:15:42.573
Okay. All that taught me
is that you're pathetic.

00:15:42.640 --> 00:15:44.875
Yeah, got it.
Maybe you should just get Bluetooth.

00:15:44.942 --> 00:15:47.244
Okay.
Blue Tooth, come over here.

00:15:50.314 --> 00:15:51.615
So, now what?

00:15:56.086 --> 00:15:58.389
Rise and shine, my Denisovich.

00:15:58.455 --> 00:16:00.157
Hi, Papa.

00:16:00.224 --> 00:16:03.561
Hello, my little devil.
Did you have sweet nightmares?

00:16:03.627 --> 00:16:07.431
Uh-huh. I dreamed
that I saw a stegosaurus.

00:16:07.498 --> 00:16:09.667
Oh... And were you
drinking his blood?

00:16:10.301 --> 00:16:11.635
No.

00:16:11.702 --> 00:16:12.970
Just throwing it out there.

00:16:13.037 --> 00:16:14.505
Hey! You want to
do something cool?

00:16:14.571 --> 00:16:17.141
Yeah!

00:16:17.207 --> 00:16:21.745
I'm going to teach you
how to turn into a bat. Like me.

00:16:21.812 --> 00:16:23.647
- See?
- Cool.

00:16:23.714 --> 00:16:25.349
Yes! Cool, like I said.

00:16:26.183 --> 00:16:27.318
Now you try.

00:16:28.218 --> 00:16:29.820
I'm a bat.

00:16:29.887 --> 00:16:31.755
I'm a bat.
I'm a bat. I'm a bat.

00:16:31.822 --> 00:16:32.957
I'm a bat.

00:16:33.724 --> 00:16:35.292
I mean, a real bat.

00:16:35.359 --> 00:16:36.827
I'm a bat!

00:16:38.762 --> 00:16:43.267
Denisovich. Take a breath.
You can really turn into a bat.

00:16:43.334 --> 00:16:45.369
Try. Feel the bat.

00:16:47.738 --> 00:16:49.239
Not a chicken.

00:16:51.709 --> 00:16:53.744
What's that?
The electric boogaloo?

00:16:53.811 --> 00:16:56.680
If I show you I can bust a move,
will you try to fly, then?

00:16:56.747 --> 00:16:57.747
Uh-huh.

00:17:12.627 --> 00:17:14.431
Dad? Why are you guys dancing?

00:17:15.598 --> 00:17:17.800
Uh, he was sleep-dancing.

00:17:17.867 --> 00:17:19.236
Come on, sweetie.
Back to bed.

00:17:19.303 --> 00:17:22.239
"Back to bed"?
It's already after 8:00 p.m.

00:17:22.306 --> 00:17:24.241
Don't you remember
the new sleep schedule?

00:17:24.308 --> 00:17:25.209
He's going to human
classes half the day.

00:17:25.275 --> 00:17:27.044
Uh...

00:17:27.111 --> 00:17:30.114
If he could just sleep till 2:00 A.M.
tonight, it'd be so great for him.

00:17:30.180 --> 00:17:32.116
But, honeydeath,
six of Wayne's wolf pups

00:17:32.182 --> 00:17:34.118
are having
a birthday party tonight.

00:17:34.184 --> 00:17:36.286
You wouldn't want
him to miss that.

00:17:36.353 --> 00:17:40.124
Dad, I love the wolf pups,
but they're a little too rough for Dennis.

00:17:40.190 --> 00:17:42.426
"Too rough"?

00:17:42.493 --> 00:17:44.495
Haven't you noticed?
Dennis is different.

00:17:44.561 --> 00:17:47.364
What are you saying?
Denisovich shouldn't be around monsters?

00:17:47.431 --> 00:17:50.668
I love monsters!
Video! Video! Ha!

00:17:50.734 --> 00:17:52.836
Oh, you wanna show Papa Drac
your monster video?

00:17:52.903 --> 00:17:53.903
Yeah!

00:17:56.774 --> 00:17:58.909
Who's the coolest monster?

00:17:58.976 --> 00:18:00.744
Kakie!

00:18:00.811 --> 00:18:03.781
Wee! Kakie one happy monster!

00:18:03.847 --> 00:18:06.383
Kakie love cake! Yummy!

00:18:06.450 --> 00:18:08.786
Tummy get a tummyache.

00:18:08.852 --> 00:18:12.222
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
How is that a monster?

00:18:12.289 --> 00:18:14.391
Have some cake,
Wuzzlelumplebum.

00:18:14.458 --> 00:18:18.362
Remember, kids,
a real monster always shares.

00:18:18.429 --> 00:18:23.233
"Shares"? Yes! When I think monsters,
I think "shares."

00:18:23.300 --> 00:18:26.804
Now, let me tell you what a real
monster is, Denisovich.

00:18:26.870 --> 00:18:30.474
Dad, please. He's practically five already.
Don't force it.

00:18:34.344 --> 00:18:36.580
Slow down, Wuzzlelumplebum.

00:18:42.052 --> 00:18:45.622
<i>♪ Twinkle, twinkle, ♪
♪ little star How I wonder ♪</i>

00:18:45.689 --> 00:18:48.158
Mommy,
I'm too old for lullabies.

00:18:48.225 --> 00:18:50.394
What?
That's not how that one goes.

00:18:50.461 --> 00:18:52.029
This is the way
most people sing it.

00:18:52.096 --> 00:18:54.298
"Most people"?
What's wrong with...

00:18:54.364 --> 00:18:57.801
<i>♪ Suffer, suffer, ♪
♪ scream in pain ♪</i>

00:18:57.868 --> 00:19:01.238
<i>♪ Blood is spilling ♪
♪ from your brain ♪</i>

00:19:01.305 --> 00:19:04.007
Daddy. Come on. You know
how I sang it to you.

00:19:04.074 --> 00:19:07.211
<i>♪ Zombies gnaw you ♪
♪ like a plum ♪</i>

00:19:07.277 --> 00:19:10.414
<i>♪ Piercing cries ♪
♪ and you succumb ♪</i>

00:19:12.049 --> 00:19:15.953
<i>♪ Suffer, suffer, ♪
♪ scream in pain ♪</i>

00:19:16.019 --> 00:19:21.058
<i>♪ You will never ♪
♪ breathe again ♪</i>

00:19:23.260 --> 00:19:24.528
Still works.

00:19:44.781 --> 00:19:45.849
Oh...

00:19:47.751 --> 00:19:49.853
Happy birthday,
Wally, Wilson,

00:19:49.920 --> 00:19:51.855
Whoopi,
Waylon, Weepy and Wanye.

00:19:53.557 --> 00:19:56.160
Denisovich! My big boy! You made it!

00:19:57.161 --> 00:19:59.396
I thought about
what you said, Dad.

00:19:59.463 --> 00:20:01.198
Maybe I was being
a little overprotective.

00:20:01.265 --> 00:20:03.167
Thank you, coffin cake.

00:20:04.168 --> 00:20:05.803
Dennis! I love you! Zing!

00:20:05.869 --> 00:20:07.404
Hi, Winnie.

00:20:07.471 --> 00:20:10.607
I just love your yummy strawberry locks!
Zing, zing!

00:20:13.777 --> 00:20:17.648
Winnie. Give him his space, hon.
I'm sorry, Mavis.

00:20:17.714 --> 00:20:20.384
It's okay, Aunt Wanda.
They're just playing.

00:20:20.450 --> 00:20:24.154
Holy rabies! Limbo?
I used to love that game!

00:20:24.221 --> 00:20:26.056
Get in there, Mavey.

00:20:26.123 --> 00:20:27.724
Really? But I'm a parent now.

00:20:27.791 --> 00:20:29.159
Show 'em how it's done.

00:20:29.226 --> 00:20:30.460
Okay. Okay, okay.

00:20:39.469 --> 00:20:41.071
No way! A pinata?

00:20:44.942 --> 00:20:46.677
Oh, Mavis, honey.
That's for later.

00:20:46.743 --> 00:20:48.645
Whoo!

00:20:48.712 --> 00:20:50.352
We don't want
the pups to have too much...

00:20:50.814 --> 00:20:52.249
Candy!

00:20:55.852 --> 00:20:56.852
Sugar.

00:21:04.561 --> 00:21:06.597
I'm sorry.
Did I start all that?

00:21:06.663 --> 00:21:08.703
Don't worry. There's a reason
they call it a litter.

00:21:18.542 --> 00:21:19.542
Whoa!

00:21:20.844 --> 00:21:22.813
Dennis! Are you okay?

00:21:22.879 --> 00:21:24.781
I got a candy.

00:21:24.848 --> 00:21:26.750
Look! Your tooth came out.

00:21:26.817 --> 00:21:29.253
Are you kidding me?
He got his tooth knocked out?

00:21:29.319 --> 00:21:32.356
Oh, yes, indeed.
Here comes the fang.

00:21:32.422 --> 00:21:35.525
Dad. His baby tooth wasn't a fang.
Why would this one be?

00:21:35.592 --> 00:21:37.160
He's not a monster.

00:21:39.463 --> 00:21:40.463
Ooh!

00:21:42.099 --> 00:21:45.135
The sun's gonna come out soon,
and we gotta get to his classes.

00:21:45.202 --> 00:21:48.939
What's wrong with the classes we have here?
Like the kids' yoga?

00:21:49.006 --> 00:21:53.043
Yoga!

00:21:53.110 --> 00:21:55.178
This is Denisovich's home.

00:21:55.245 --> 00:21:56.780
I don't know, Dad.

00:21:56.847 --> 00:21:58.215
What don't you know?

00:21:58.282 --> 00:22:01.752
Well, we've been
talking about moving.

00:22:01.818 --> 00:22:04.254
Somewhere safer
for Dennis.

00:22:04.321 --> 00:22:07.224
Maybe where Johnny
grew up in California.

00:22:07.291 --> 00:22:11.161
I'm sorry, but you can't just make
somebody something they're not.

00:22:13.297 --> 00:22:14.765
Come on, honey.
We have to go.

00:22:14.831 --> 00:22:16.033
Zing, zing?

00:22:17.167 --> 00:22:19.970
Mavey, wait.
You can't mean that.

00:22:23.440 --> 00:22:25.242
You're in on this?
The leaving?

00:22:25.309 --> 00:22:28.145
Uh...
It's not definite at all.

00:22:28.211 --> 00:22:29.413
It's just something
she's definitely talking about,

00:22:29.479 --> 00:22:31.715
but until we do it,
it's not definitized.

00:22:35.185 --> 00:22:37.120
Did he just cover
me with birdseed?

00:22:38.021 --> 00:22:39.423
Yeah, he covered me.

00:22:49.733 --> 00:22:52.469
Dad, it's not a fang.

00:22:52.536 --> 00:22:55.672
Dad, I don't know
if it's the right place for Dennis.

00:22:55.739 --> 00:22:57.374
Right, Johnny?

00:22:57.441 --> 00:23:00.677
Oh, hey, dudeman.
It's not me. It's Mavey.

00:23:00.744 --> 00:23:04.114
Hey, dudeman.
I'm afraid to say anything.

00:23:04.181 --> 00:23:06.450
Hey, dudeman.
I'm a dudeman!

00:23:06.516 --> 00:23:08.986
Uh, Drac? Who you talkin' to?

00:23:09.052 --> 00:23:11.221
Do not disturb.
The count's wiggin' out in here.

00:23:12.656 --> 00:23:14.524
What are you
wiggin' out about, Drac?

00:23:14.591 --> 00:23:17.928
The kids. Mavey Wavey's saying
she wants to leave.

00:23:17.995 --> 00:23:20.630
She wants to leave? What about Johnny?
He doesn't wanna go.

00:23:20.697 --> 00:23:23.033
He's making the hotel
more human-y for Dennis.

00:23:23.100 --> 00:23:24.868
You know, seeing
that he isn't a monster.

00:23:24.935 --> 00:23:26.303
He is a monster!

00:23:26.370 --> 00:23:27.437
He's just a late fanger.

00:23:27.504 --> 00:23:28.538
Mmm-hmm.

00:23:28.605 --> 00:23:30.140
And I could be a hand model.

00:23:30.207 --> 00:23:32.442
Shut up!
It's all that human-y stuff

00:23:32.509 --> 00:23:36.046
that's confusing
poor Denisovich.

00:23:36.113 --> 00:23:39.249
So maybe you gotta get the kid
around more monster-y things. Ooh!

00:23:39.316 --> 00:23:41.451
Oh, I need a cape.

00:23:41.518 --> 00:23:44.621
I can't. She's always around,
checking up on me.

00:23:44.688 --> 00:23:47.924
Man, if you could
just get some alone time.

00:23:47.991 --> 00:23:50.360
Wait a minute.
That's what Johnny wants, too.

00:23:51.361 --> 00:23:53.530
Alone time with Mavis.

00:23:56.299 --> 00:23:57.501
Have they even had a vacation

00:23:57.567 --> 00:23:59.069
since before
they were married?

00:24:03.073 --> 00:24:06.309
They're going to now. And so are we.
Frank, you're a genius.

00:24:18.088 --> 00:24:19.088
Mmm-hmm.

00:24:23.260 --> 00:24:25.762
We'll take Denisovich
to all our old haunts.

00:24:27.664 --> 00:24:29.064
Each of us will
show him our skills.

00:24:31.201 --> 00:24:33.303
Teach him how to be a monster.

00:24:35.772 --> 00:24:38.308
And he'll be
fanging it up in no time.

00:24:38.375 --> 00:24:40.510
Boy turns five next week.

00:24:40.577 --> 00:24:43.113
If he's not a vampire by his birthday,
it ain't happenin'.

00:24:43.180 --> 00:24:45.415
Oh, it ain't
ain't happening, baby.

00:24:45.482 --> 00:24:47.818
All he needs is
time with his vampa.

00:24:47.884 --> 00:24:49.219
"Vampa"?

00:24:49.286 --> 00:24:50.620
Vampire grandpa.

00:24:50.687 --> 00:24:52.622
Come on, man.
That's obvious.

00:24:55.025 --> 00:24:57.227
Johnny. Come outside.

00:24:57.294 --> 00:24:59.629
What? Who is it?

00:24:59.696 --> 00:25:02.199
It's your father-in-law.
I need to talk to you.

00:25:03.867 --> 00:25:04.868
What's up?

00:25:05.602 --> 00:25:06.603
Oh.

00:25:06.670 --> 00:25:09.005
Let me get rid of them. Sorry.

00:25:09.072 --> 00:25:12.175
No problem-o.
I was kinda diggin' the attention.

00:25:14.511 --> 00:25:17.214
Can they stay?
I don't think they're ready to leave yet.

00:25:17.280 --> 00:25:19.416
Come on.
Go to your mother.

00:25:19.483 --> 00:25:20.684
Look, you want
to stay here, right?

00:25:20.750 --> 00:25:22.519
Of course.

00:25:22.586 --> 00:25:25.255
This is the first place
where I can really be myself.

00:25:25.322 --> 00:25:28.758
I haven't felt this alive
since they invented stuffed-crust pizza.

00:25:28.825 --> 00:25:33.129
Well, then, we've got some work to do.
Okay, so here's the plan.

00:25:33.196 --> 00:25:35.465
Maybe it's a good idea
to take her to your hometown.

00:25:35.532 --> 00:25:37.767
But remember...

00:25:37.834 --> 00:25:40.670
So, it's sliced avocado,
rolled oats with apricot,

00:25:40.737 --> 00:25:43.039
the Aveeno
moisturizer after every bath.

00:25:43.106 --> 00:25:46.409
And then the shea butter
on his tush before his PJs

00:25:46.476 --> 00:25:49.179
and then 20 minutes
with the nebulizer

00:25:49.246 --> 00:25:52.449
while I read his Learning Factory
Phonics book to him.

00:25:52.516 --> 00:25:55.886
It's asking a lot, Dad.
We could just take Dennis with us.

00:25:55.952 --> 00:25:58.822
What? Are you kidding me?
And get him off his routine?

00:25:58.889 --> 00:26:00.190
No, no, no.

00:26:00.257 --> 00:26:02.292
You kids go to California,

00:26:02.359 --> 00:26:04.728
and see if it's the right place
to raise Denisovich.

00:26:04.794 --> 00:26:06.563
And you remember
how to video chat?

00:26:06.630 --> 00:26:09.933
Yes, yes. With the phone
and the buttons and the agony.

00:26:10.000 --> 00:26:13.870
Thanks for being so understanding, Dad.
I know you'll keep him safe.

00:26:13.937 --> 00:26:17.474
Of course, Mavey.
Stake my heart and hope to die.

00:26:17.541 --> 00:26:19.442
I'm just gonna
miss him so much.

00:26:20.510 --> 00:26:22.212
I love you, Dennis.

00:26:22.279 --> 00:26:24.080
I love you, Mommy.

00:26:24.147 --> 00:26:27.717
I'll tell him Mavey Wavey stories
every night before bed.

00:26:27.784 --> 00:26:29.653
You're the best.
I love you, Dad.

00:26:32.956 --> 00:26:35.559
Gonna miss all you guys.
You're all my family.

00:26:36.293 --> 00:26:38.361
Love you, Drac.

00:26:38.428 --> 00:26:40.730
Yes. I love you, too.

00:26:40.797 --> 00:26:44.501
Now, remember the plan.
Just keep her distracted and happy.

00:26:44.568 --> 00:26:47.003
- But not too happy, capisce?
- Got it.

00:26:47.070 --> 00:26:49.606
Operation "Just Keep Her
Distracted and Happy",

00:26:49.673 --> 00:26:52.976
"But Not Too Happy, Capisce,"
starts now. Cool?

00:26:53.043 --> 00:26:54.511
Smiling on the outside.

00:26:54.578 --> 00:26:55.679
Will you hug my backpack?

00:26:55.745 --> 00:26:56.745
No.

00:27:03.286 --> 00:27:05.155
Back to bed.

00:27:05.222 --> 00:27:08.358
Ah, yes, we'll get to the bed.
We all love the bed.

00:27:08.425 --> 00:27:10.694
But we're just gonna
do one thing first.

00:27:14.598 --> 00:27:16.399
Is it shorts
weather where we're going?

00:27:16.466 --> 00:27:19.135
Jeez. I hope not.
My body isn't swimsuit-ready yet.

00:27:19.202 --> 00:27:21.471
Whatever. Where's Griffin?

00:27:21.538 --> 00:27:23.858
Hey, can I have a second?
I'm just saying goodbye to Emily.

00:27:23.873 --> 00:27:25.508
Oh, brother.

00:27:25.575 --> 00:27:28.144
I'm gonna miss you so much.

00:27:28.211 --> 00:27:29.980
You know, you have to be strong, honey.

00:27:30.046 --> 00:27:31.446
Because what we
have is unbreakable.

00:27:33.750 --> 00:27:36.553
Babe, don't cry.
Everyone's looking.

00:27:36.620 --> 00:27:38.221
Okay, I gotta call him on this.

00:27:38.288 --> 00:27:41.258
Just let him play it out,
get it over with.

00:27:41.324 --> 00:27:45.795
Okay, you two lovebirds.
Drink your champagne and let's get going.

00:27:45.862 --> 00:27:48.064
Oh, yeah.
No, sure. Okay.

00:27:48.131 --> 00:27:49.131
Cheers, babe.

00:27:51.234 --> 00:27:53.536
Oh. You klutz.

00:27:53.603 --> 00:27:55.672
We can't say
nothin' about this?

00:27:55.739 --> 00:27:57.100
No. We don't have
time for zingers.

00:28:05.582 --> 00:28:09.019
How do you click in
the stupid car seat?

00:28:09.085 --> 00:28:10.754
You gotta cut
those nails, man.

00:28:10.820 --> 00:28:12.522
We just strap our
kids down with duct tape.

00:28:17.394 --> 00:28:18.995
What's he doing here?

00:28:19.062 --> 00:28:21.865
I told him he could come.
He's never been outside the hotel.

00:28:21.931 --> 00:28:24.634
Blobby, there's no room.
Sorry, man.

00:28:27.303 --> 00:28:29.005
Yeah, that ain't happenin'.

00:28:29.072 --> 00:28:31.708
Fine, put him on the Rascal.
Let's just get going.

00:28:37.313 --> 00:28:38.348
Oh.

00:28:46.623 --> 00:28:49.025
Where are we going,
Papa Drac?

00:28:49.092 --> 00:28:51.494
Oh, Denisovich, we're going
to have an adventure.

00:28:51.561 --> 00:28:53.730
A monster-y adventure.

00:28:53.797 --> 00:28:56.666
Yay! Monsters!
We're gonna eat cake.

00:28:56.733 --> 00:28:58.768
What did he say?

00:28:58.835 --> 00:29:01.237
No.
No cake on this monster trip.

00:29:01.304 --> 00:29:04.841
No cake, cebause Kakie says,
"Too much cake makes tummy ache."

00:29:05.175 --> 00:29:06.476
Yay!

00:29:06.543 --> 00:29:07.977
"A monster always shares."

00:29:09.646 --> 00:29:11.047
Wow!

00:29:11.114 --> 00:29:13.450
We may need
more than a week.

00:29:13.516 --> 00:29:16.686
Hey, you know who
could fix the kid in a snap? Vlad.

00:29:16.753 --> 00:29:20.223
What? We don't need to call Vlad.
We got this.

00:29:20.290 --> 00:29:24.828
You see, Denisovich,
monsters are nice, just like you.

00:29:24.894 --> 00:29:29.099
But when the moon comes out,
the real monster fun begins.

00:29:30.934 --> 00:29:32.469
Being scary. Right, guys?

00:29:36.406 --> 00:29:37.767
Guys? Guys!
What is wrong with you?

00:29:39.709 --> 00:29:41.845
Come on.
Everybody likes that song.

00:29:41.911 --> 00:29:45.682
We're not everybody.
We're scary monsters. Remember?

00:29:45.749 --> 00:29:46.983
Hey, what are you putting in?

00:29:47.050 --> 00:29:48.518
It's an audio book.

00:29:48.585 --> 00:29:51.688
Bigfoot's life story.
He reads it himself.

00:29:51.755 --> 00:29:53.389
Chapter One.

00:30:25.789 --> 00:30:26.856
Wow!

00:30:26.923 --> 00:30:29.058
This is gonna be so amazing.

00:30:29.125 --> 00:30:32.162
Oh, yeah. You're gonna be so happy,
but not too happy.

00:30:32.228 --> 00:30:33.663
- Huh?
- What?

00:30:33.730 --> 00:30:35.999
I wanna see everything
you did growing up.

00:30:36.065 --> 00:30:38.201
As long as you're
distracted, capisce?

00:30:40.136 --> 00:30:41.704
We can hit a few spots
on the way to my parents.

00:30:41.771 --> 00:30:43.273
Lemme just quickly call home.

00:30:43.339 --> 00:30:45.008
Ah! Don't do that.

00:30:45.074 --> 00:30:47.877
It's only 1:00 A.M. there.
Dennis isn't even up yet.

00:30:47.944 --> 00:30:51.214
Right. I'm just not used to
being away from him.

00:30:51.281 --> 00:30:53.716
Everything's gonna be cool.
Your dad was so all over it.

00:30:53.783 --> 00:30:55.819
I know. He's the best.

00:31:16.506 --> 00:31:17.807
Right turn, here.

00:31:18.808 --> 00:31:20.643
Denisovich, rise and shine.

00:31:22.278 --> 00:31:24.881
Boys, this bringing
back any memories?

00:31:24.948 --> 00:31:28.218
We used to prowl around here
when we were in our 100s.

00:31:28.284 --> 00:31:31.588
The Dark Forest of Slobozia.

00:31:40.997 --> 00:31:42.632
Nice how they built it up.

00:31:42.699 --> 00:31:44.868
Okay, out of the car.

00:31:44.934 --> 00:31:47.470
Denisovich,
you're going to see

00:31:47.537 --> 00:31:50.039
every monster
do his specialty.

00:31:50.106 --> 00:31:53.743
First, Frank's gonna show us
how he scares people.

00:31:53.810 --> 00:31:56.579
Yay! He's gonna say, "Boo."

00:31:56.646 --> 00:31:59.115
Yeah, I don't
think "boos" ever work.

00:31:59.182 --> 00:32:02.218
But that's why we're here.
To learn from the master.

00:32:03.419 --> 00:32:05.088
Okay, I'll give it a shot.

00:32:21.137 --> 00:32:23.306
Yeah, guess it just depends
on work.

00:32:24.941 --> 00:32:26.476
Frankenstein!

00:32:26.543 --> 00:32:28.611
Hey, how ya doin'?

00:32:28.678 --> 00:32:31.781
You're awesome! Can we take a picture?
Is that okay?

00:32:31.848 --> 00:32:33.850
Sure, okay. Little selfie action.

00:32:35.118 --> 00:32:36.118
For real?

00:32:36.786 --> 00:32:38.321
Awesome!
Thank you so much.

00:32:38.388 --> 00:32:39.656
Hey, have a great day.

00:32:40.323 --> 00:32:41.858
Boo!

00:32:41.925 --> 00:32:44.060
Oh. He's adorable.
He's adorable.

00:32:44.127 --> 00:32:46.062
Adorable, yes.

00:32:46.129 --> 00:32:48.998
Not scary,
but "boo" is a start.

00:32:59.909 --> 00:33:02.679
My birthday cake's gonna have
the coolest guy on it.

00:33:02.745 --> 00:33:05.081
Let me guess. Kakie.

00:33:05.148 --> 00:33:08.952
No. He's so cool.
He climbs walls and wears a cape.

00:33:09.018 --> 00:33:11.988
Oh, really. And who
is this very cool guy?

00:33:12.055 --> 00:33:13.723
Batman!

00:33:13.790 --> 00:33:15.525
Batman. Great.

00:33:15.592 --> 00:33:18.795
You don't know anyone else
with a cape that's cool?

00:33:18.861 --> 00:33:19.963
This is good. Stop here.

00:33:26.135 --> 00:33:29.405
Okay, Wayne. It's your turn.
Go kill something.

00:33:29.472 --> 00:33:30.606
Denisovich, watch this.

00:33:30.673 --> 00:33:31.908
What?

00:33:31.975 --> 00:33:33.276
I told you, come on.

00:33:33.343 --> 00:33:35.211
If we don't
inspire Denisovich,

00:33:35.278 --> 00:33:37.246
how's he going to
find his inner monster?

00:33:37.313 --> 00:33:38.648
Who's in a monster?

00:33:38.715 --> 00:33:40.216
Nobody, just...

00:33:40.283 --> 00:33:41.283
Here, have an avocado.

00:33:41.317 --> 00:33:42.552
Yay!

00:33:42.619 --> 00:33:44.620
Your mommy says
it's a good fat.

00:33:44.687 --> 00:33:46.756
Whatever
the heaven that means.

00:33:46.823 --> 00:33:48.791
Listen, I'm not gonna
set monsters back again

00:33:48.858 --> 00:33:51.361
just to make your
grandkid like vampires.

00:33:51.427 --> 00:33:53.547
Anyway, there's nothing to kill here.
It's all been...

00:33:56.899 --> 00:33:58.167
Aw...

00:33:58.234 --> 00:33:59.402
What a cutie.

00:34:00.236 --> 00:34:01.604
But kill him.

00:34:01.671 --> 00:34:05.274
Oh, great. You know
I haven't done this in years.

00:34:05.341 --> 00:34:08.244
We don't need to kill anymore.
We have Pop-Tarts.

00:34:08.311 --> 00:34:10.713
Denisovich,
you're going to love this.

00:34:10.780 --> 00:34:13.683
Wayne's going to eat that whole deer,
and the next one's yours.

00:34:13.750 --> 00:34:14.851
Wayne, go.

00:34:19.522 --> 00:34:21.824
Oh, man. I'm too old for this.

00:34:21.891 --> 00:34:24.193
Okay, how's it go again?

00:34:25.561 --> 00:34:27.063
No, no, wait.
That's for the moon.

00:34:27.130 --> 00:34:29.297
Oh, I growl. Right, here goes.

00:34:31.467 --> 00:34:32.768
Growl!

00:34:32.835 --> 00:34:33.835
Get it, boy.

00:34:39.542 --> 00:34:40.976
Get it, Uncle Wayne.

00:34:43.413 --> 00:34:47.315
Some werewolf.
Did you actually say the word "growl?"

00:34:47.382 --> 00:34:48.784
You're a werewussy.

00:34:48.851 --> 00:34:50.186
I said I was rusty.

00:34:51.888 --> 00:34:53.523
Gimme me that Frisbee.

00:34:53.589 --> 00:34:55.024
No! It's my Frisbee!
I fetched it!

00:34:55.091 --> 00:34:56.692
Give it to me!
Give it back!

00:34:56.759 --> 00:34:59.228
Give it over here!
Give me that! Give it back!

00:35:04.901 --> 00:35:06.502
He's fine.
He's Blobby.

00:35:09.272 --> 00:35:12.175
This place is so
amazing and scenic.

00:35:12.241 --> 00:35:13.409
What do you
wanna show me first?

00:35:13.476 --> 00:35:14.777
Mmm. I don't know.

00:35:14.844 --> 00:35:16.279
It's pretty,
but there's really

00:35:16.345 --> 00:35:17.747
nothing to do
once it gets dark.

00:35:17.814 --> 00:35:19.215
Wait. What's that place?

00:35:23.719 --> 00:35:25.922
So, you're telling
me that I can pick

00:35:25.988 --> 00:35:27.668
between all these
different kinds of chips?

00:35:28.391 --> 00:35:29.559
Yes.

00:35:29.625 --> 00:35:31.394
How do people decide?

00:35:32.095 --> 00:35:33.362
Whoa!

00:35:33.429 --> 00:35:36.232
Now what's that
beautiful fountain of rubies?

00:35:37.433 --> 00:35:39.402
Johnny,
have you tried this Slurpee?

00:35:39.469 --> 00:35:41.471
Not that quickly, hon.

00:35:41.537 --> 00:35:44.874
It comes in 48 flavors.
We have to try them all.

00:35:48.144 --> 00:35:49.879
Uh, I don't know
if we have time.

00:35:49.946 --> 00:35:52.648
Why? This place is open
all night. Right, sir?

00:35:52.715 --> 00:35:53.715
Yes.

00:35:58.321 --> 00:35:59.655
Johnny, look.

00:35:59.722 --> 00:36:02.859
They're making a TV
show about this place and we're the stars.

00:36:02.925 --> 00:36:04.227
Hello, world.

00:36:04.293 --> 00:36:05.695
Awesome.

00:36:05.762 --> 00:36:09.365
It's totally awesome.
You're so lucky, Kal.

00:36:10.433 --> 00:36:11.968
Hello, world.

00:36:15.505 --> 00:36:17.373
Okay, Murray. Your turn.

00:36:18.808 --> 00:36:22.278
Excuse us. Do you know where someone
can get a bite around here?

00:36:22.345 --> 00:36:25.548
Did you seriously just ask a vampire
where to get a bite?

00:36:25.615 --> 00:36:28.084
Oh, gosh. I didn't mean...
We're not from around here.

00:36:28.151 --> 00:36:30.553
This is so embarrassing.
Just keep going.

00:36:30.620 --> 00:36:32.555
Sorry to bother you.
Love your chocolate cereal.

00:36:36.092 --> 00:36:37.994
So, what do you
want me to do now?

00:36:38.060 --> 00:36:39.762
Denisovich,
you won't believe it.

00:36:39.829 --> 00:36:42.098
The mummy can
crash through walls

00:36:42.165 --> 00:36:44.100
and turn into
a swarm of beetles

00:36:44.167 --> 00:36:46.435
and put a curse on anyone.

00:36:46.502 --> 00:36:47.937
That sounds mean.

00:36:48.004 --> 00:36:49.539
It's fun mean. Okay.

00:36:49.605 --> 00:36:51.207
So, check it out.

00:36:51.274 --> 00:36:55.811
Murray's going to conjure up
the biggest sandstorm you've ever seen.

00:36:55.878 --> 00:36:57.547
Hit it!

00:36:57.613 --> 00:36:59.282
Sandstorm?
It's been awhile.

00:36:59.348 --> 00:37:01.317
Not my problem.
Do it. Say your little spell.

00:37:01.384 --> 00:37:04.086
Okay.

00:37:04.153 --> 00:37:07.890
I got this. Frank, Wayne, Griffin,
just try not to faint.

00:37:28.945 --> 00:37:29.945
Ow!

00:37:29.979 --> 00:37:31.214
My back.

00:37:40.323 --> 00:37:41.591
Oh. Wait.

00:37:47.997 --> 00:37:49.599
How cute!

00:37:50.666 --> 00:37:52.335
Ow! Ow!

00:37:56.572 --> 00:37:59.942
Wait. Stop at that playground.
Look at these cute kids.

00:38:06.649 --> 00:38:09.552
Holy rabies!
This looks like a blast.

00:38:09.619 --> 00:38:10.987
I don't know, Mavey.

00:38:11.053 --> 00:38:13.889
This can be pretty dangerous
if you don't know what you're doing.

00:38:13.956 --> 00:38:15.625
Of course, I rock these bikes.

00:38:15.691 --> 00:38:17.059
May I, little dude?

00:38:17.893 --> 00:38:20.496
Check it out. Oh, yeah.

00:38:20.563 --> 00:38:22.565
This is how I rolled
every summer.

00:38:24.634 --> 00:38:26.602
Whoo-hoo!

00:38:26.669 --> 00:38:27.669
Whoa, whoa!

00:38:37.046 --> 00:38:38.447
I think I scratched it.

00:38:38.514 --> 00:38:39.515
Oh...

00:38:39.582 --> 00:38:41.183
My turn.

00:38:41.250 --> 00:38:44.186
Mavey, I told you,
it took me years to get this good.

00:38:44.253 --> 00:38:46.222
Well, I'll give it a try.

00:39:25.361 --> 00:39:28.064
You feel me now?
That's my girlfriend, suckers.

00:39:28.130 --> 00:39:29.465
Your wife, Johnny.

00:39:29.532 --> 00:39:31.233
My wife. Even better.

00:39:31.300 --> 00:39:34.937
That was sick, lady.
Where did you learn how to do that stuff?

00:39:35.004 --> 00:39:36.372
Transylvania.

00:39:36.439 --> 00:39:39.709
That's cool. I have a cousin
from Pennsylvania.

00:39:39.775 --> 00:39:43.479
Oh. These little guys are so sweet.
Dennis would love them.

00:39:43.546 --> 00:39:45.247
What an awesome
place to raise a kid.

00:39:45.314 --> 00:39:47.183
Oh. To raise a kid?

00:39:47.249 --> 00:39:49.118
I don't know about awesome.

00:39:49.185 --> 00:39:52.254
Maybe tubular. Capisce?

00:39:52.321 --> 00:39:53.956
Anyways, we should
hit my folks' place.

00:39:54.023 --> 00:39:54.890
I said we'd be there by now.

00:39:54.957 --> 00:39:56.325
Sure.

00:39:56.392 --> 00:39:58.527
Oh, hey, it's after
3:00 o'clock in Transylvania.

00:39:58.594 --> 00:40:00.496
I'm gonna check
on Dennis, okay?

00:40:05.501 --> 00:40:08.304
Chocolate cereal.
Are you kidding me?

00:40:08.371 --> 00:40:10.506
It's okay, Drac.
It's 'cause they love us.

00:40:10.573 --> 00:40:13.008
Yeah.
Monsters are what's goin' on.

00:40:13.075 --> 00:40:15.177
Oh, yeah.
You should embrace it like I did.

00:40:15.244 --> 00:40:17.213
I've got a best-selling
workout video.

00:40:17.279 --> 00:40:19.915
Follow me, ladies.
Right. And left.

00:40:19.982 --> 00:40:22.651
No, girls. Watch me.
You're not watching.

00:40:22.718 --> 00:40:25.654
Here we go. And eight
and seven and six...

00:40:25.721 --> 00:40:27.423
That's not me, guys.

00:40:27.490 --> 00:40:30.860
Come on, even Bigfoot's tearin' it up
in the German soccer league.

00:40:38.834 --> 00:40:40.714
Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no.

00:40:41.170 --> 00:40:42.838
It's Mavis.

00:40:42.905 --> 00:40:44.640
You gotta answer it.

00:40:44.707 --> 00:40:46.242
You're pushin' too hard.
Lighter.

00:40:46.308 --> 00:40:48.344
All right!

00:40:48.411 --> 00:40:51.347
Denisovich, wake up.
Oh, boy, he's out cold.

00:40:51.414 --> 00:40:52.548
I got this.

00:40:55.317 --> 00:40:56.585
Dad, what took so long?

00:40:56.652 --> 00:40:57.953
What?

00:40:58.020 --> 00:41:01.323
Nothing, Mavey.
We're all great here at the hotel.

00:41:01.390 --> 00:41:03.392
Just doing hotel things.

00:41:03.459 --> 00:41:04.760
Sorry, can't handle your breath.

00:41:04.827 --> 00:41:06.295
I hear ya.

00:41:06.362 --> 00:41:07.830
How are you?

00:41:07.897 --> 00:41:09.432
We're having a blast.

00:41:09.498 --> 00:41:12.568
We just went biking and mini-marting.
It's so fun here.

00:41:13.302 --> 00:41:14.737
Is Dennis okay?

00:41:14.804 --> 00:41:16.038
Oh. Of course.

00:41:16.105 --> 00:41:17.873
You want to see him?

00:41:17.940 --> 00:41:19.742
Yes. Yes, I do.

00:41:19.809 --> 00:41:21.110
Hi, baby. How are you?

00:41:21.177 --> 00:41:22.745
Mommy.

00:41:22.812 --> 00:41:23.812
I happy.

00:41:24.280 --> 00:41:25.414
Aw.

00:41:25.481 --> 00:41:27.183
Hey, little dude.

00:41:27.249 --> 00:41:28.818
Why is he wearing sunglasses?

00:41:28.884 --> 00:41:30.953
Oh, we were playing.

00:41:31.020 --> 00:41:33.789
It's a superhero thing.

00:41:33.856 --> 00:41:37.293
Cebause,
I'm Sunglasses Man, to the rescue!

00:41:37.359 --> 00:41:38.961
Okay, take it down a notch.
I'm flying.

00:41:39.028 --> 00:41:41.564
You sound funny.

00:41:41.630 --> 00:41:44.700
Oh, no, no, that's his
Sunglasses Man voice.

00:41:44.767 --> 00:41:47.503
Static. The signal is bad.
Mavis, are you there?

00:41:49.004 --> 00:41:50.004
Yeah, I'm still...

00:41:51.140 --> 00:41:53.876
All right.
I guess he's having fun.

00:41:53.943 --> 00:41:55.644
Of course he is.

00:41:57.646 --> 00:42:00.015
Wow, I nailed it
with the Sunglasses Man.

00:42:00.082 --> 00:42:01.684
Right off the top of my head.

00:42:01.750 --> 00:42:03.719
I threw in a "cebause."
Did everyone see that?

00:42:03.786 --> 00:42:06.555
She said she was having fun.
Johnny's blowing it.

00:42:06.622 --> 00:42:09.859
She's biking and mini-marting.
She's gonna wanna move!

00:42:09.925 --> 00:42:12.761
I gotta fix this kid now.
Are we almost there or what?

00:42:12.828 --> 00:42:14.730
Okay, I may

00:42:14.797 --> 00:42:16.398
have taken a wrong
turn a few miles back.

00:42:16.465 --> 00:42:18.267
- Don't get mad.
- What?

00:42:20.369 --> 00:42:22.538
Someone turn on
the navigator on this thing.

00:42:22.605 --> 00:42:24.573
Look how light I touch it.

00:42:24.640 --> 00:42:27.576
Please enter your destination.

00:42:27.643 --> 00:42:31.280
Please. I am begging you.

00:42:33.949 --> 00:42:36.418
Yeah, this is gonna
be good, Denisovich.

00:42:36.485 --> 00:42:39.355
Scary stuff, okay?
It's in you.

00:42:39.421 --> 00:42:42.191
We just gotta
concentrate on the scary.

00:42:42.258 --> 00:42:45.027
Papa Drac?
Do you miss Grandma?

00:42:45.094 --> 00:42:47.863
Miss Grandma?
Oh. Sure, I do.

00:42:47.930 --> 00:42:52.201
I miss her every day.
She was my zing.

00:42:53.135 --> 00:42:54.603
Why do you ask?

00:42:54.670 --> 00:42:56.071
I don't know.

00:42:56.138 --> 00:42:58.107
Do you miss anybody?

00:42:58.173 --> 00:43:00.276
I miss Mommy and Daddy.

00:43:00.342 --> 00:43:03.112
And who else?
You miss that Winnie?

00:43:03.178 --> 00:43:06.282
The pup who tackles you
and tries to lick you all the time?

00:43:06.348 --> 00:43:08.584
Yeah, but we're just friends.

00:43:08.651 --> 00:43:11.453
Oh, no, no, no.
You're a Dracula.

00:43:11.520 --> 00:43:15.324
You can't just be friends with a cute,
hairy number like Winnie.

00:43:15.391 --> 00:43:20.996
Right turn, now!
Here. You imbecile!

00:43:21.063 --> 00:43:22.131
Oh, right. Turn, Griffin!

00:43:22.197 --> 00:43:23.365
Yes, Papa Drac.

00:43:28.470 --> 00:43:33.242
Wait and see, fellas. This kid'll
be guzzling goat blood in no time.

00:43:33.309 --> 00:43:36.679
- You have arrived at your destination.
- Yes!

00:43:36.745 --> 00:43:38.547
- Yes!
- Here we are.

00:43:38.614 --> 00:43:40.983
It's the vampire summer camp
I went to as a kid.

00:43:41.050 --> 00:43:43.452
What's it, Camp Vamp?

00:43:43.519 --> 00:43:45.588
No. Who names
their camp "Camp Vamp?"

00:43:45.654 --> 00:43:47.823
It's Camp Winnepacaca.

00:44:08.410 --> 00:44:10.112
You see, Denisovich?

00:44:10.179 --> 00:44:14.249
This is where I learned
to catch mice and shapeshift.

00:44:14.316 --> 00:44:17.987
And use my incredible powers and strength.
It's pretty cool. Huh?

00:44:18.053 --> 00:44:19.053
Badminton.

00:44:23.592 --> 00:44:26.895
Yes, I don't
remember this badminting.

00:44:26.962 --> 00:44:29.932
Well, well, is this a night?
How ya doin', folks?

00:44:29.999 --> 00:44:31.800
I'm Dana, the director.

00:44:31.867 --> 00:44:34.336
We're sure excited to have you
legends visitin' us.

00:44:34.403 --> 00:44:36.372
What can I do you for?

00:44:36.438 --> 00:44:41.176
Well, I'm very interested
in sending my grandboy, Denisovich, here.

00:44:41.243 --> 00:44:45.714
Oh. This little redheaded,
non-fangy little guy?

00:44:45.781 --> 00:44:49.251
Oh, they're in there. He's a late fanger.
That's why we came here.

00:44:49.318 --> 00:44:51.453
Can you show us
some of the drills,

00:44:51.520 --> 00:44:53.589
like where they
catch the mice?

00:44:53.656 --> 00:44:56.625
Can do.
A-course now we call it Tee-Mousing.

00:45:07.670 --> 00:45:10.139
So they don't have
to catch the mice?

00:45:10.205 --> 00:45:13.676
Nope. We find this is a good way
to build their confidence.

00:45:15.477 --> 00:45:16.545
Come here.

00:45:17.846 --> 00:45:19.606
It's right there!
What's the matter with you?

00:45:21.383 --> 00:45:22.651
Hokey-pokey.

00:45:24.286 --> 00:45:25.821
Ah!

00:45:25.888 --> 00:45:29.258
There it is, Denisovich.
Where Papa learned to fly.

00:45:29.324 --> 00:45:31.360
Ooh! I wanna fly like Papa.

00:45:36.799 --> 00:45:37.966
Uh...

00:45:38.033 --> 00:45:39.768
Yeah. We're over here, now.

00:45:41.070 --> 00:45:43.672
Had to scale it down.
Insurance.

00:45:47.409 --> 00:45:49.678
Help me. Help me. Help me.

00:45:49.745 --> 00:45:52.681
Hokey-pokey.
See ya at the campfire.

00:45:57.553 --> 00:46:00.189
Well, gosh!
Welcome, you two.

00:46:00.255 --> 00:46:01.423
Hey, gang.

00:46:01.490 --> 00:46:04.360
Hi, guys. This is so exciting.

00:46:04.426 --> 00:46:08.564
Ah!
Look at all of this. So cool.

00:46:08.630 --> 00:46:11.166
Wow! I can't
believe I'm actually here.

00:46:11.233 --> 00:46:12.534
Well, you are.

00:46:12.601 --> 00:46:15.904
Now, how does it work?
Are you up all night and sleep all day?

00:46:15.971 --> 00:46:17.272
Yeah.

00:46:17.339 --> 00:46:18.340
Oh. I'll do
whatever you guys want.

00:46:18.407 --> 00:46:19.942
Good.

00:46:20.008 --> 00:46:22.578
'Cause I bought this
pretty sunhat for you. Linda.

00:46:22.644 --> 00:46:24.580
But otherwise this poncho,
if you wanna be safe.

00:46:24.646 --> 00:46:26.415
We can deal with
it later, Linda.

00:46:26.482 --> 00:46:27.482
Okay.

00:46:27.483 --> 00:46:29.151
Oh! Come see.

00:46:30.319 --> 00:46:32.020
I've set up your bedroom.

00:46:35.991 --> 00:46:39.128
It's just like Transylvania.

00:46:39.194 --> 00:46:42.664
Oh, Transylvania.
That was a fun experience.

00:46:42.731 --> 00:46:44.800
Mike was afraid he'd get
disemboweled and eaten,

00:46:44.867 --> 00:46:46.802
but I told him he
was just being silly.

00:46:46.869 --> 00:46:48.509
That was you, Linda.

00:46:48.871 --> 00:46:50.773
Oh. There they are.

00:46:50.839 --> 00:46:53.609
You know, we have a couple
of mixed families in the neighborhood,

00:46:53.675 --> 00:46:55.577
so I thought I'd
invite them over.

00:46:55.644 --> 00:46:57.679
They might be nice
for you guys to talk to

00:46:57.746 --> 00:46:59.481
since you're
thinkin' about moving here.

00:47:01.216 --> 00:47:03.352
Hi, Caren.
Hi, Pandragora.

00:47:03.418 --> 00:47:04.920
Welcome, Mavis.
Hey, guys.

00:47:06.488 --> 00:47:09.725
Yeah, you're gonna dig it here.
Don't even worry.

00:47:09.792 --> 00:47:13.128
People are totally cool
with our lifestyle choice.

00:47:13.195 --> 00:47:14.496
I mean, the kids get picked on a little,

00:47:14.563 --> 00:47:16.765
but it toughens them up.

00:47:16.832 --> 00:47:18.633
Oh, hey, you guys.
And this is Loretta.

00:47:18.667 --> 00:47:20.636
She's married to Paul,
who's a werewolf.

00:47:20.702 --> 00:47:22.304
Excuse me?

00:47:22.371 --> 00:47:25.808
Yes, I was telling Mavis about the other
monster-human couples in town.

00:47:25.874 --> 00:47:27.709
I am not a werewolf.

00:47:27.776 --> 00:47:30.379
Oh. I thought...

00:47:30.445 --> 00:47:33.048
Well, you're welcome to stay
and have some cupcakes.

00:47:36.685 --> 00:47:40.756
<i>♪ Vampires will be friends forever ♪</i>

00:47:40.823 --> 00:47:44.960
<i>♪ Through the centuries together ♪</i>

00:47:45.027 --> 00:47:49.231
<i>♪ Even in the brightest sunny weather ♪</i>

00:47:49.298 --> 00:47:53.435
<i>♪ Vampires will be friends forever ♪</i>

00:47:53.502 --> 00:47:57.039
<i>♪ Literally ♪</i>

00:47:57.105 --> 00:48:00.409
<i>♪ Forever ♪</i>

00:48:04.246 --> 00:48:07.015
Great job, vampires.
Give yourselves a hug.

00:48:07.082 --> 00:48:08.082
Mmm...

00:48:13.121 --> 00:48:14.156
We're going.

00:48:14.223 --> 00:48:15.223
What? Where?

00:48:21.597 --> 00:48:23.031
Why are we doing this?

00:48:23.098 --> 00:48:25.901
You'd rather be listening
to those putrid new songs?

00:48:25.968 --> 00:48:28.003
What happened to Michael Row
Your Corpse Ashore?

00:48:28.070 --> 00:48:30.639
Or Old McWerewolf Had An Axe?

00:48:36.044 --> 00:48:37.880
We shouldn't be up here, Drac.

00:48:37.946 --> 00:48:39.948
Who's ready to fly?

00:48:40.015 --> 00:48:42.217
Me! Me! Like a superhero.

00:48:42.284 --> 00:48:44.086
Better! Like a vampire!

00:48:45.020 --> 00:48:46.922
This thing is rickety.

00:48:46.989 --> 00:48:49.291
You know what?
Maybe the kid isn't supposed to fly.

00:48:49.358 --> 00:48:52.628
Quiet. This is how they learn.
You throw them and they figure it out.

00:48:53.595 --> 00:48:55.163
It's how I was taught.

00:48:55.230 --> 00:48:56.598
I wanna fly now!

00:48:56.665 --> 00:49:00.002
Attabat. You know Papa's right here
if you need him.

00:49:00.068 --> 00:49:01.503
Uh. I can't watch this.

00:49:01.570 --> 00:49:03.071
Please don't.

00:49:03.138 --> 00:49:05.607
Here we go!

00:49:05.674 --> 00:49:06.674
Wee!

00:49:11.947 --> 00:49:13.215
He's still not flying.

00:49:13.282 --> 00:49:14.283
He will.

00:49:15.617 --> 00:49:17.085
Still not.

00:49:17.152 --> 00:49:18.152
It'll happen.

00:49:19.321 --> 00:49:20.689
This is a tall tower.

00:49:20.756 --> 00:49:22.224
That's why it's good.

00:49:22.291 --> 00:49:23.558
You should get him.

00:49:23.625 --> 00:49:24.693
He's gonna fall to his death.

00:49:24.760 --> 00:49:26.628
He's taking his time.

00:49:28.096 --> 00:49:29.598
Drac!

00:49:29.665 --> 00:49:31.566
I did that my first time.

00:49:31.633 --> 00:49:33.235
He's getting too
close to the ground!

00:49:34.636 --> 00:49:36.038
You know what?
He's not gonna fly.

00:49:43.612 --> 00:49:44.613
Ah.

00:49:46.682 --> 00:49:49.685
I told you.
Papa's always here for you.

00:49:49.751 --> 00:49:52.020
Again! Again!

00:49:52.087 --> 00:49:54.756
Oh, dear. Oh, my devil.
We're gonna have to report this.

00:49:54.823 --> 00:49:56.391
You mean to the papers?

00:49:56.458 --> 00:49:59.828
I guess it was pretty cool,
but I'm not about getting press.

00:49:59.895 --> 00:50:02.364
No, sir.
I mean the authorities.

00:50:02.431 --> 00:50:04.866
I can't not report
child endangerment.

00:50:04.933 --> 00:50:07.703
Whoa!
Listen to me. That was fun.

00:50:07.769 --> 00:50:10.138
Your singing is
child endangerment.

00:50:10.205 --> 00:50:12.207
Should we go
down and help him?

00:50:12.274 --> 00:50:15.110
Nope. I told him this was nuts.
He's on his own.

00:50:15.177 --> 00:50:16.678
We have to call
the boy's mother.

00:50:16.745 --> 00:50:18.280
No, that ain't happening.

00:50:18.347 --> 00:50:20.916
His mother's
already nutsy koo koo!

00:50:20.983 --> 00:50:23.585
I have to follow protocol.

00:50:23.652 --> 00:50:27.222
You will not follow protocol.

00:50:27.289 --> 00:50:29.224
I'm a vampire.
I can't be hypnotized.

00:50:30.025 --> 00:50:31.226
Right.

00:50:31.293 --> 00:50:33.795
Now, please. Don't
make me call the police.

00:50:33.862 --> 00:50:35.664
No one's calling nobody!

00:50:37.599 --> 00:50:38.599
Aah!

00:50:38.633 --> 00:50:40.202
Fire!

00:50:40.268 --> 00:50:43.071
Stop, drop and roll.
Stop, drop and roll.

00:50:43.138 --> 00:50:44.473
Screaming's not helping!

00:50:44.539 --> 00:50:45.539
Yay!

00:50:53.148 --> 00:50:54.950
Are we bad guys, Papa Drac?

00:50:55.584 --> 00:50:56.584
Bad?

00:50:58.387 --> 00:51:01.156
No. You're
the best kid in the world.

00:51:01.223 --> 00:51:04.559
We didn't start the fire.
It was the tower.

00:51:04.626 --> 00:51:09.097
That's a very unsafe tower.
You're lucky we don't call the authorities.

00:51:09.164 --> 00:51:10.966
Let's go, my hero.

00:51:11.033 --> 00:51:13.769
Cebause I'm Batman!
To the Batmobile!

00:51:13.835 --> 00:51:15.337
Yes. To the...

00:51:26.815 --> 00:51:29.451
Sorry about all that stuff.
I guess they thought you'd like it.

00:51:29.518 --> 00:51:31.620
Why do I feel so weird here?

00:51:31.686 --> 00:51:33.822
No, hon.
They're being weird.

00:51:33.889 --> 00:51:36.291
I think they're
just trying to help me.

00:51:36.358 --> 00:51:39.828
I mean, I grew up knowing nothing
living inside that hotel.

00:51:39.895 --> 00:51:42.831
And you learned about everything
growing up in Santa Claus.

00:51:42.898 --> 00:51:45.367
Santa Cruz. But, uh...

00:51:45.434 --> 00:51:48.203
Maybe if Dennis grows up
away from Transylvania,

00:51:48.270 --> 00:51:52.240
he won't be so freaky.
Like me.

00:51:52.307 --> 00:51:55.777
Are you nuts?
Mavis, you're a blast.

00:51:55.844 --> 00:51:58.680
You're so full of life
and curious about everything.

00:51:58.747 --> 00:52:00.982
If Dennis grows up
to be just like you,

00:52:01.049 --> 00:52:03.151
I'll be the luckiest dad in the world.

00:52:03.218 --> 00:52:06.288
I love you, Johnnystein.

00:52:06.354 --> 00:52:07.689
You know what?

00:52:07.756 --> 00:52:10.659
As long as we're all together,
we'll be happy anywhere.

00:52:10.726 --> 00:52:12.194
Even at the hotel.

00:52:13.361 --> 00:52:14.963
Yes!

00:52:17.432 --> 00:52:18.767
What are you doing?

00:52:18.834 --> 00:52:21.303
Check out this
video my friend sent me.

00:52:21.369 --> 00:52:23.371
This kid is
an awesome daredevil.

00:52:24.473 --> 00:52:25.607
Ah.

00:52:25.674 --> 00:52:26.575
Oh, dude!

00:52:26.641 --> 00:52:27.709
Did you get it?

00:52:27.776 --> 00:52:29.010
Wait! Is that Dennis?

00:52:29.077 --> 00:52:33.782
- No! Is it? No. It's just hard to see.
- But...

00:52:33.849 --> 00:52:36.351
Oops. Just deleted it.
So, it's gone.

00:52:46.928 --> 00:52:48.997
What? It's Mavis.
I'm not answering it.

00:52:51.032 --> 00:52:53.001
Come on, Drac. You have to.

00:52:55.604 --> 00:52:57.272
All right!

00:52:57.339 --> 00:52:58.840
Yes, honeybunch.

00:52:58.907 --> 00:53:00.509
Dad? Where are you?

00:53:00.575 --> 00:53:04.546
Um... We're outside the hotel
having a little cookout.

00:53:04.613 --> 00:53:06.248
It's perfectly safe.

00:53:06.314 --> 00:53:07.849
What's that noise?
Is that a siren?

00:53:07.916 --> 00:53:11.086
Oh, those are just
some wailing banshees checking in.

00:53:11.153 --> 00:53:12.954
Quiet, you banshees.

00:53:13.021 --> 00:53:15.757
We're trying to have a perfectly safe
cookout over here.

00:53:15.824 --> 00:53:19.427
Mommy!
I wanna say hi! Mommy! Mommy!

00:53:19.494 --> 00:53:20.929
Papa Drac just tried
to teach me how to fly.

00:53:20.996 --> 00:53:22.430
Wait a minute.
Is that the mother?

00:53:22.497 --> 00:53:23.932
Oh, no. Static again.

00:53:25.200 --> 00:53:27.135
I am coming back to
the hotel right now.

00:53:27.202 --> 00:53:31.306
And you better be there or I swear, Dad,
you're gonna be very sorry.

00:53:32.107 --> 00:53:34.075
What's goin' on?

00:53:34.142 --> 00:53:35.377
We need to get
home right away.

00:53:35.443 --> 00:53:36.443
Whoa!

00:53:37.846 --> 00:53:40.482
Okay.
I'll go wake up my backpack.

00:53:40.549 --> 00:53:42.083
Guys, we gotta move.

00:53:42.150 --> 00:53:44.519
We got no car!
How we gonna get out of here?

00:53:44.586 --> 00:53:46.087
Don't worry.
I made a call.

00:53:55.597 --> 00:53:58.567
I'm sorry, Blobby.
We really meant to call you sooner.

00:54:05.106 --> 00:54:06.341
Hit it!

00:54:21.656 --> 00:54:22.757
Transylvania.

00:54:22.824 --> 00:54:24.159
You want to go where?

00:54:24.226 --> 00:54:25.594
Transylvania.
As soon as possible.

00:54:25.660 --> 00:54:27.662
We don't fly
direct to Transylvania.

00:54:27.729 --> 00:54:29.097
You don't?

00:54:29.164 --> 00:54:31.366
You can go to Bucharest,
but you'll have to

00:54:31.433 --> 00:54:33.268
switch planes in
Chicago and then Zurich.

00:54:33.335 --> 00:54:35.003
So, when would we get there?

00:54:35.070 --> 00:54:38.073
Well, the Chicago flight's delayed
due to bad weather.

00:54:43.645 --> 00:54:45.247
So, two seats in coach?

00:54:45.680 --> 00:54:46.680
No!

00:54:47.215 --> 00:54:48.650
- No!
- Yes.

00:55:08.770 --> 00:55:11.740
You have to go now?
When we finally have no traffic.

00:55:11.806 --> 00:55:13.408
You're killing me, Blobby.

00:55:23.418 --> 00:55:26.421
I still have some cloud on me.
Gotta do a selfie!

00:55:26.488 --> 00:55:27.989
Johnny! Not now!

00:55:28.056 --> 00:55:29.291
Okay. Maybe later.

00:55:35.630 --> 00:55:38.099
This scooter thing's out of juice.
We're never gonna make it.

00:55:38.166 --> 00:55:39.601
Frank, blow.

00:55:49.044 --> 00:55:50.145
Now!

00:56:13.034 --> 00:56:16.237
How fun is this?
Why are you laughing? You like that?

00:56:16.304 --> 00:56:17.572
Watch this.

00:56:19.374 --> 00:56:20.814
Coochie-coochie-coochie-coo!

00:56:29.451 --> 00:56:31.252
Now this is flying,
Denisovich.

00:56:31.319 --> 00:56:33.455
Like a vampire.

00:56:34.923 --> 00:56:35.923
Wee!

00:56:37.125 --> 00:56:39.828
That's my boy. Look at you go.

00:56:48.970 --> 00:56:52.240
You're the coolest guy
who wears a cape, Papa Drac.

00:57:04.619 --> 00:57:05.619
Ugh!

00:57:20.935 --> 00:57:23.638
So, hey, when are you going
to get here already?

00:57:23.705 --> 00:57:25.306
We've been waiting...

00:57:27.342 --> 00:57:29.477
Give me my son.

00:57:29.544 --> 00:57:31.913
We just went out
for some avocados.

00:57:31.980 --> 00:57:33.448
Mommy! I flew!

00:57:33.515 --> 00:57:35.150
I saw.

00:57:35.216 --> 00:57:37.152
<i>♪ Mother's already nutsy koo koo ♪</i>

00:57:37.218 --> 00:57:39.788
<i>♪ Nutsy koo koo ♪</i>

00:57:39.854 --> 00:57:41.614
- <i>♪ Koo koo ♪</i>
- Oh, dear. Oh, dear

00:57:41.656 --> 00:57:43.358
<i>♪ Oh, my devil ♪
♪ I have to follow protocol ♪</i>

00:57:43.425 --> 00:57:45.185
<i>♪ That ain't happening ♪
♪ That ain't happening ♪</i>

00:57:45.226 --> 00:57:46.628
<i>♪ Mother's already ♪</i>

00:57:46.694 --> 00:57:47.694
<i>♪ Koo koo ♪</i>

00:57:48.797 --> 00:57:49.797
<i>♪ Koo koo ♪</i>

00:57:57.772 --> 00:58:01.142
I was worried Dennis wasn't safe
around other monsters.

00:58:01.209 --> 00:58:04.212
Now I don't even feel like
he's safe around you.

00:58:04.279 --> 00:58:05.447
But I was just...

00:58:05.513 --> 00:58:06.881
What was it you said?

00:58:06.948 --> 00:58:10.351
Human, monster, unicorn.
That it didn't matter?

00:58:10.418 --> 00:58:12.554
Well, I just know
his life would...

00:58:12.620 --> 00:58:15.023
We'll have his birthday party
here on Wednesday.

00:58:15.089 --> 00:58:16.991
Then we're moving.

00:58:17.058 --> 00:58:19.894
Please, Mavey. Don't leave.

00:58:19.961 --> 00:58:23.097
Maybe you've let humans
into your hotel, Dad.

00:58:23.164 --> 00:58:25.333
But I don't think you've let them
into your heart.

00:58:57.098 --> 00:58:58.098
Hmm...

00:59:09.944 --> 00:59:12.480
I can do it.
I can do it.

00:59:13.181 --> 00:59:16.484
I'm a bat. I'm a bat.

00:59:16.551 --> 00:59:18.486
I'm a bat.
I'm a bat. I'm a bat!

00:59:18.553 --> 00:59:20.221
Dennis?
What are you doing, sweetie?

00:59:20.288 --> 00:59:22.457
Uh... Nothing.

00:59:22.524 --> 00:59:25.527
Careful. Let me help
you down from there.

00:59:25.593 --> 00:59:27.695
Are you getting
excited about your big party?

00:59:27.762 --> 00:59:29.564
I guess so.

00:59:29.631 --> 00:59:32.567
You know who's coming?
Daddy's whole family.

00:59:32.634 --> 00:59:34.869
Grandpa Mike
and Grandma Linda.

00:59:34.936 --> 00:59:38.673
All your cousins and aunts and uncles
who love you so much.

00:59:38.740 --> 00:59:42.744
And then they're gonna be with us
when we move to California.

00:59:42.810 --> 00:59:47.382
Mommy, are we going away
cebause I'm not a monster?

00:59:47.448 --> 00:59:50.985
What?
No. Dennis, of course not.

00:59:51.052 --> 00:59:53.588
It's just grown-up stuff.

00:59:53.655 --> 00:59:56.224
Okay.
But what about Papa Drac?

00:59:56.291 --> 00:59:58.826
He's gonna be here all alone.

00:59:58.893 --> 01:00:01.796
Papa Drac has to stay
here to run the hotel.

01:00:01.863 --> 01:00:04.399
But he'll visit us.
And we'll visit him.

01:00:04.465 --> 01:00:06.000
Can we call him every night?

01:00:06.067 --> 01:00:07.602
Sure.

01:00:13.274 --> 01:00:14.909
Awesome!

01:00:14.976 --> 01:00:16.811
Hello. We're here.

01:00:19.013 --> 01:00:24.419
<i>♪ The night brings ♪
♪ Johnny's family here ♪</i>

01:00:24.485 --> 01:00:29.123
<i>♪ To take away all ♪
♪ that Drac holds dear ♪</i>

01:00:29.190 --> 01:00:30.258
Welcome, welcome.

01:00:30.325 --> 01:00:32.527
<i>♪ Hide your feelings ♪</i>

01:00:32.594 --> 01:00:36.264
<i>♪ Keep them all inside ♪</i>

01:00:43.371 --> 01:00:46.107
Dude, why do you wanna leave?
This place is out of control.

01:00:46.174 --> 01:00:47.475
I don't wanna leave.

01:00:47.542 --> 01:00:49.577
All these awesome
freakazoids!

01:00:49.644 --> 01:00:51.079
So, who's the
coolest monster?

01:00:51.145 --> 01:00:52.880
Kakie.

01:00:52.947 --> 01:00:54.349
Kakie.

01:00:54.415 --> 01:00:55.695
Kakie.
What a wussbag.

01:00:56.684 --> 01:01:00.154
Isn't it nice to have
the whole family together?

01:01:00.221 --> 01:01:04.258
Mavis, do you have any cousins or
thingies in your family?

01:01:04.325 --> 01:01:06.461
No. It's just been me and Dad.

01:01:06.527 --> 01:01:09.163
I never did ask how
you lost your mom.

01:01:09.230 --> 01:01:11.232
Oh. She was
killed by angry humans.

01:01:11.299 --> 01:01:12.467
Oh...

01:01:12.533 --> 01:01:15.370
<i>♪ Awkward ♪</i>

01:01:15.436 --> 01:01:17.705
But there is my Grandpa Vlad.

01:01:17.772 --> 01:01:19.240
Oh, you have a grandpa?

01:01:19.307 --> 01:01:20.987
Yeah. He'll be at the party.
I invited him.

01:01:22.443 --> 01:01:24.479
You invited him?

01:01:24.545 --> 01:01:28.349
Dad, he's never seen Dennis.
I wanted them to meet once before we go.

01:01:28.416 --> 01:01:32.687
Sure.
Great. Peachy. Good old Vlad.

01:01:32.754 --> 01:01:34.722
Anybody have a wet wipe?

01:01:52.573 --> 01:01:56.878
Holy rabies.
He finally invites me to something.

01:01:56.944 --> 01:01:58.379
He's got a grandkid?

01:01:58.446 --> 01:02:00.214
And he never told you?

01:02:00.281 --> 01:02:04.619
Easy, Bela. At least there's
another vampire in the family.

01:02:04.686 --> 01:02:07.255
It's at a hotel?
Fancy schmancy.

01:02:07.321 --> 01:02:10.425
Hotels are for humans!

01:02:15.663 --> 01:02:18.299
Bela, shut your blood hole.
Look what you started.

01:02:18.366 --> 01:02:20.301
Don't worry, gang.

01:02:20.368 --> 01:02:23.638
I raised my son to hate and kill
and steal the souls of humans

01:02:23.705 --> 01:02:25.773
like a good boy.

01:02:25.840 --> 01:02:29.110
Yes,
Grandpa Vlad will be so happy

01:02:29.177 --> 01:02:33.514
when he sees the big masquerade party
Johnny and I have planned.

01:02:33.581 --> 01:02:34.716
What?

01:02:38.252 --> 01:02:39.887
Play along.
It's my dad.

01:02:39.954 --> 01:02:41.723
You have a dad?
That's funny.

01:02:41.789 --> 01:02:44.192
Listen to me. My dad cannot
know you're a human.

01:02:44.258 --> 01:02:46.461
Or any of your family.

01:02:46.527 --> 01:02:48.963
What? But, Drac,
I'm proud that we're...

01:02:49.030 --> 01:02:51.799
Or he'll steal your family's souls
and eat your backpack.

01:02:54.335 --> 01:02:55.903
That's right, gang.

01:02:55.970 --> 01:02:58.906
We're gonna make the birthday
a monster masquerade party.

01:02:59.841 --> 01:03:02.076
- Really?
- Oh, that's lovely.

01:03:02.143 --> 01:03:06.614
Sort of like a last hurrah before Dennis
gets to be with normal people.

01:03:06.681 --> 01:03:08.716
I couldn't have
said it better.

01:03:28.402 --> 01:03:32.039
What do you think, Mavis?
I think I'm starting to like being creepy.

01:03:37.145 --> 01:03:39.680
You're lucky we don't
call the authorities.

01:03:39.747 --> 01:03:41.649
Let's go, my hero.

01:03:41.716 --> 01:03:43.217
Cebause I'm Batman!

01:03:44.418 --> 01:03:46.554
Yes! To the Batmobile!

01:03:52.460 --> 01:03:54.580
Got your butt kicked by a girl, Batman.

01:03:56.964 --> 01:03:59.534
Yeah. Whatever.
I'm not about to cry.

01:04:03.104 --> 01:04:06.407
Hotel Transylvania.

01:04:06.474 --> 01:04:09.944
I smell humans!

01:04:10.011 --> 01:04:12.980
Tear it down!

01:04:13.047 --> 01:04:17.585
Bela, we're in the outside world.
You're gonna smell humans.

01:04:17.652 --> 01:04:21.189
You know what? Just wait outside for me.
This is family stuff.

01:04:21.255 --> 01:04:22.857
You'll only get in the way.

01:04:22.924 --> 01:04:24.725
I just wanna meet
the little fanger.

01:04:24.792 --> 01:04:26.260
He should know
his great-vampa.

01:04:26.327 --> 01:04:27.995
His what?

01:04:28.062 --> 01:04:31.265
Vampire grandpa. Come on.
That was obvious.

01:04:33.835 --> 01:04:35.469
Amazing party!

01:04:35.536 --> 01:04:38.372
So, what do you think?

01:04:38.439 --> 01:04:40.942
This is your vampire costume?
What are you, nuts?

01:04:41.008 --> 01:04:42.476
I ordered it online.

01:04:42.543 --> 01:04:44.445
It was the only place
that delivered overnight.

01:04:44.512 --> 01:04:46.914
You look like you got
a baboon's butt on your head.

01:04:46.981 --> 01:04:48.916
Have you at least
practiced your voice?

01:04:48.983 --> 01:04:50.985
You can't just
talk like a hippie.

01:04:51.052 --> 01:04:52.687
I'm not a hippie.
I'm a slacker.

01:04:52.753 --> 01:04:55.122
Talk like a vampire.

01:04:55.189 --> 01:05:00.695
My name is Count Jonafang.
I am a vampire.

01:05:00.761 --> 01:05:04.398
Okay, vampires don't go around saying,
"I am a vampire."

01:05:04.465 --> 01:05:08.836
Sorry. I am Count Jonafang.
Bleh, bleh-bleh.

01:05:08.903 --> 01:05:10.304
Are you kidding me?

01:05:10.371 --> 01:05:11.839
I'm sorry. I'm nervous.

01:05:11.906 --> 01:05:14.008
Yeah, listen,
if you think I don't like it,

01:05:14.075 --> 01:05:16.010
you definitely
don't want to say,

01:05:16.077 --> 01:05:17.845
"Bleh, bleh-bleh,"
in front of my father.

01:05:17.912 --> 01:05:19.347
Sir, Master Kakie
has arrived.

01:05:19.413 --> 01:05:21.148
Oh, hey.

01:05:21.215 --> 01:05:24.118
Drac, this is Brandon, a.k.a. Kakie.

01:05:24.185 --> 01:05:26.187
- We got him for Dennis.
- Hey, man.

01:05:26.254 --> 01:05:28.256
Nauseated to meet you.

01:05:28.322 --> 01:05:30.658
When does this happen?
I got a book fair in half an hour.

01:05:34.529 --> 01:05:36.898
All right. Where's my vampson?

01:05:39.634 --> 01:05:42.737
Oh, please. Still has to make
a dramatic entrance.

01:05:42.803 --> 01:05:45.439
Dad! Look at you!

01:05:45.506 --> 01:05:47.942
So you run a hotel now?

01:05:48.009 --> 01:05:51.779
From Prince of Darkness
to King of Room Service.

01:05:51.846 --> 01:05:53.915
Yes. So good to see you.

01:05:53.981 --> 01:05:55.816
I'll be right with you.

01:06:01.055 --> 01:06:03.925
Keep Vlad away from
the humans and Mavis.

01:06:04.892 --> 01:06:05.960
I'm on it.

01:06:06.894 --> 01:06:10.364
Oh, now that is
a neat costume.

01:06:10.431 --> 01:06:12.900
These two smell funny.

01:06:12.967 --> 01:06:14.568
Oh, you're European.

01:06:14.635 --> 01:06:17.204
It's called deodorant.

01:06:17.271 --> 01:06:20.308
Nothing like insulting
an entire continent, Linda.

01:06:20.374 --> 01:06:22.443
Hey, Count!
How goes it? Frankenstein.

01:06:22.510 --> 01:06:24.679
Actually, I'm technically
Frankenstein's monster.

01:06:24.745 --> 01:06:26.145
Frankenstein,
he's the doctor who...

01:06:26.180 --> 01:06:29.583
Would love to hear more.
Call my people.

01:06:29.650 --> 01:06:32.050
So, let me introduce you
to some of your son's other buddies.

01:06:32.920 --> 01:06:34.622
This is Murray.

01:06:34.689 --> 01:06:36.357
Please don't kill me!

01:06:36.424 --> 01:06:39.226
I mean, yo, V! What's up?

01:06:39.293 --> 01:06:42.096
Talking toilet paper.
Well, that's a new one.

01:06:43.464 --> 01:06:45.733
All right! Where's the kid?
That's who I wanna meet.

01:06:45.800 --> 01:06:47.034
Johnny!

01:06:49.937 --> 01:06:52.807
This is Dracula's son-in-law.

01:06:52.873 --> 01:06:56.711
I am Count Jonafang.

01:06:56.777 --> 01:06:59.180
Bleh, bleh, black sheep.

01:06:59.246 --> 01:07:02.216
Have you any wool?

01:07:02.283 --> 01:07:04.118
What's that
thing on your head?

01:07:04.185 --> 01:07:06.554
Looks like my
grandmother's boobies.

01:07:09.223 --> 01:07:11.292
Daddy, who's the man
with the funny face?

01:07:11.359 --> 01:07:12.560
Is this the kid?

01:07:12.626 --> 01:07:13.794
It sure is.

01:07:13.861 --> 01:07:15.496
Let me see those fangs.

01:07:15.563 --> 01:07:16.797
What are you doin'?

01:07:16.864 --> 01:07:18.699
Oh, I just love him so much.

01:07:18.766 --> 01:07:21.736
I want to hug him
right in the fangs that he has.

01:07:24.005 --> 01:07:27.308
I repeat,
lemme see those fangs.

01:07:36.984 --> 01:07:40.087
Oh, he's a late fanger,
just like you.

01:07:40.154 --> 01:07:42.390
Yes. Yes.
Just like me.

01:07:44.625 --> 01:07:47.328
The big shot here
was a little crybaby, all right.

01:07:47.395 --> 01:07:48.663
Yes, yes, I was.

01:07:48.729 --> 01:07:49.830
Used to pee in his bed.

01:07:49.897 --> 01:07:51.365
Okay, Dad.

01:07:51.432 --> 01:07:54.235
We just need to
scare the fangs out of the kid.

01:07:54.301 --> 01:07:55.936
Hare ha hangs?

01:07:56.003 --> 01:07:58.672
Yeah, it's what I did
for Mr. Tough Guy here.

01:07:58.739 --> 01:08:01.242
First, you've got
to possess something

01:08:01.308 --> 01:08:03.744
the late fanger
finds sweet and innocent.

01:08:03.811 --> 01:08:05.413
Then you show them
what's what and...

01:08:05.479 --> 01:08:07.481
Pop!

01:08:07.548 --> 01:08:11.652
Trust me. It'll scare
the fangs right out. Right, Drac?

01:08:11.719 --> 01:08:15.089
Seriously, guys, if I'm late for the
book fair, I'll miss the street fair.

01:08:15.956 --> 01:08:18.292
That's your guy.

01:08:18.359 --> 01:08:21.162
Possessed?
But Dennis will be so upset.

01:08:21.228 --> 01:08:23.330
Don't you get it?
This is our ticket.

01:08:23.397 --> 01:08:26.200
If it works for Denisovich,
boom! He's a vampire.

01:08:26.267 --> 01:08:28.102
And you all get to stay here.

01:08:28.169 --> 01:08:29.837
All right. All right.

01:08:30.871 --> 01:08:32.807
- Capisce.
- Good call.

01:08:32.872 --> 01:08:35.910
Kids, everyone, have a seat.

01:08:35.975 --> 01:08:38.412
Dennis has a big
surprise for you.

01:08:38.479 --> 01:08:42.817
The one and only Kakie,
The Cake Monster!

01:08:42.883 --> 01:08:46.821
Hey, kids! It's me, Kakie!

01:08:46.886 --> 01:08:50.224
What a wonderful
Kakie day it is!

01:08:50.291 --> 01:08:54.127
Now, I have a question.
Who here loves cake?

01:08:59.633 --> 01:09:00.633
Rise!

01:09:01.435 --> 01:09:02.435
Whoa, whoa...

01:09:09.076 --> 01:09:11.779
Why am I floating?
Can I have the stage manager, please?

01:09:11.845 --> 01:09:13.613
This isn't working for me.

01:09:13.680 --> 01:09:14.680
Whoa...

01:09:18.051 --> 01:09:20.187
Wow!

01:09:20.254 --> 01:09:23.357
Scary, Denisovich?
You feeling anything? Any change?

01:09:23.424 --> 01:09:24.859
Is Kakie okay?

01:09:27.228 --> 01:09:31.332
I want all the cake.
Sharing is for cowards.

01:09:34.033 --> 01:09:37.438
I don't remember any of this
from the TV show.

01:09:37.505 --> 01:09:40.341
Um... I think I saw it
on a Blu-Ray disc, bonus stuff.

01:09:40.407 --> 01:09:42.510
Wait, why is Grandpa
Vlad up there?

01:09:48.983 --> 01:09:51.484
I'm scared, Papa.
What's happening to Kakie?

01:09:56.223 --> 01:09:59.627
You don't eat cake.
Cake eat you!

01:09:59.693 --> 01:10:01.128
No!

01:10:01.195 --> 01:10:02.296
Stop it!

01:10:05.699 --> 01:10:08.636
What just happened, man?
I'm outta here.

01:10:08.702 --> 01:10:12.039
None of these parents
better review this on Yelp.

01:10:12.106 --> 01:10:13.908
Hey, what did you just do?

01:10:13.974 --> 01:10:16.443
A few more seconds and the kid's fangs
would have popped right out.

01:10:16.510 --> 01:10:18.045
I don't care.
It's not worth it.

01:10:18.112 --> 01:10:20.080
What's not worth it?

01:10:20.147 --> 01:10:23.551
It was my last attempt
to make the boy a vampire, so you'd stay.

01:10:23.617 --> 01:10:26.587
By ruining his favorite thing?
How could you do that?

01:10:26.654 --> 01:10:27.721
We were desperate.

01:10:27.788 --> 01:10:29.657
You were in on this?

01:10:29.723 --> 01:10:31.158
Dennis won't be
happy in my town.

01:10:31.225 --> 01:10:32.993
Dennis hasn't been there.

01:10:33.060 --> 01:10:35.329
<i>♪ Now husband and wife ♪</i>

01:10:35.396 --> 01:10:37.431
<i>♪ Feel the strain ♪
♪ and the strife ♪</i>

01:10:37.498 --> 01:10:39.200
Shut up!

01:10:39.266 --> 01:10:41.468
Johnny,
Dennis is not a monster.

01:10:42.903 --> 01:10:45.039
He likes avocado.

01:10:45.105 --> 01:10:46.607
'Cause you don't let
him eat anything fun.

01:10:46.674 --> 01:10:48.842
I think Dennis just
wants to be normal.

01:10:48.909 --> 01:10:51.245
Can we stop using
the word "normal"?

01:10:51.312 --> 01:10:53.581
Where we live now,
he's normal.

01:10:53.647 --> 01:10:57.418
He is who he is.
And you can't change him, Dad.

01:11:00.387 --> 01:11:01.827
Dennis, where are you going?

01:11:01.889 --> 01:11:03.224
Away.

01:11:05.025 --> 01:11:07.394
But it's not safe
out here by yourself.

01:11:07.461 --> 01:11:10.431
I know a place where
we can hide. Follow me.

01:11:16.870 --> 01:11:18.339
If you didn't stop me,

01:11:18.405 --> 01:11:21.508
my great-grandson wouldn't
have to be a wimp his whole life

01:11:21.575 --> 01:11:23.177
like Schlumpy over here.

01:11:23.244 --> 01:11:25.112
- A wimp?
- Johnny, be cool.

01:11:25.179 --> 01:11:27.248
You wanna throw down, old man?

01:11:27.314 --> 01:11:28.949
Certified yellow
belt since 1997.

01:11:29.016 --> 01:11:31.185
No!

01:11:31.252 --> 01:11:33.354
What's this now?
You're not a vampire?

01:11:33.420 --> 01:11:35.923
Bleh?

01:11:35.990 --> 01:11:40.160
Of course he's human. He's our son.
You think we're monsters?

01:11:43.697 --> 01:11:48.502
You! You let your daughter marry a
human and have a human kid?

01:11:48.569 --> 01:11:51.739
Why don't you just
put a stake through my heart.

01:11:51.805 --> 01:11:54.942
We don't hate humans anymore,
and they don't hate us.

01:11:58.712 --> 01:12:00.614
Humans?

01:12:02.049 --> 01:12:03.450
You're a fool.

01:12:03.517 --> 01:12:06.186
Your great-grandson is
the sweetest, kindest,

01:12:06.253 --> 01:12:09.023
most special
boy I've ever met.

01:12:09.089 --> 01:12:11.158
And if you can't
give him the love

01:12:11.225 --> 01:12:12.926
he deserves
because he's half-human,

01:12:12.993 --> 01:12:14.328
then you're the fool.

01:12:15.863 --> 01:12:16.863
Oh, Daddy.

01:12:19.199 --> 01:12:20.601
Hey, where is Dennis?
Dennis!

01:12:21.869 --> 01:12:22.869
Dennis?

01:12:26.206 --> 01:12:29.176
Happy birthday, Dennis.
I made you a treat.

01:12:29.243 --> 01:12:31.445
- Dead pigeon?
- Enjoy it.

01:12:31.512 --> 01:12:34.281
'Cause once I graduate business school
and start running a company,

01:12:34.348 --> 01:12:37.217
you're not gonna get
home-cooked meals like this anymore.

01:12:37.284 --> 01:12:40.654
I have to move away, Winnie.
To California.

01:12:40.721 --> 01:12:43.490
My mommy thinks
I'm not happy here

01:12:43.557 --> 01:12:46.026
cebause I don't have
hair on my face like you.

01:12:46.093 --> 01:12:48.495
I'm sorry I'm not a monster.

01:12:48.562 --> 01:12:51.932
No, you are perfect.
You're the nicest boy I know.

01:12:51.999 --> 01:12:53.967
And I have 300 brothers.

01:12:54.034 --> 01:12:56.103
You're nice, too, Winnie.

01:13:00.374 --> 01:13:05.713
Well, well, well.
The little human and his pet.

01:13:05.779 --> 01:13:07.581
- Dennis!
- Denisovich!

01:13:07.648 --> 01:13:08.849
He's not in the room.

01:13:08.916 --> 01:13:10.384
He's not by the pool.

01:13:10.451 --> 01:13:12.086
He's not in this pot of soup.

01:13:12.152 --> 01:13:14.121
Where could he be?

01:13:14.188 --> 01:13:16.357
I don't know why I
ever invited you.

01:13:17.157 --> 01:13:18.692
Dennis!
Dennis!

01:13:18.759 --> 01:13:19.759
Denisovich!

01:13:19.793 --> 01:13:20.793
Dennis!

01:13:33.207 --> 01:13:35.008
Stop squirming.

01:13:35.075 --> 01:13:37.077
Why are you doing this?

01:13:37.144 --> 01:13:39.113
Because this is wrong.

01:13:39.179 --> 01:13:41.515
Why doesn't anybody get that?

01:13:41.582 --> 01:13:44.685
Humans don't
belong with monsters.

01:13:44.752 --> 01:13:46.053
You're wrong!

01:13:46.120 --> 01:13:47.521
I am not!

01:13:47.588 --> 01:13:50.424
I am holding you hostage.

01:13:50.491 --> 01:13:55.662
And me and my crew are gonna
tear that human-hugging hotel to shreds.

01:13:55.729 --> 01:13:57.231
You can't.

01:13:57.297 --> 01:13:58.966
Really? Why not?

01:13:59.032 --> 01:14:00.234
Cebause...

01:14:00.300 --> 01:14:01.435
Cebause, why?

01:14:02.369 --> 01:14:05.539
Cebause it will
make Papa Drac sad.

01:14:05.606 --> 01:14:09.376
Ooh... Sad. And what are you
gonna do about it?

01:14:09.443 --> 01:14:11.445
I don't know.

01:14:11.512 --> 01:14:13.480
You know why you don't know?

01:14:13.547 --> 01:14:17.684
Cebause you're just
a weak little boy.

01:14:48.182 --> 01:14:49.683
What was that?

01:14:49.750 --> 01:14:51.318
Dennis, we're coming.

01:14:53.020 --> 01:14:54.688
Are you okay, Winnie?

01:14:54.755 --> 01:14:56.123
Yes, my zing.

01:15:32.559 --> 01:15:33.660
Dennis!
There he is, right there.

01:15:33.727 --> 01:15:35.162
Dennis! Baby!

01:15:35.229 --> 01:15:36.763
My big boy!

01:15:36.830 --> 01:15:38.030
Dennis,
we were lookin' for ya.

01:15:38.031 --> 01:15:39.333
Sweetheart.

01:15:39.399 --> 01:15:40.399
I'm so happy to see you.

01:15:44.104 --> 01:15:45.506
There's his mean friends.

01:15:52.279 --> 01:15:54.281
Oh... This'll be fun.

01:16:07.294 --> 01:16:08.328
Whoo!

01:16:27.714 --> 01:16:28.715
Huh?

01:16:55.275 --> 01:16:56.643
I didn't do that.

01:17:08.322 --> 01:17:09.823
You rock, Dennis.

01:17:09.890 --> 01:17:10.991
He means Denisovich.

01:17:11.058 --> 01:17:12.326
Kakie rules!

01:17:23.070 --> 01:17:24.504
Dennis, I'm coming.
Whoa...

01:17:29.910 --> 01:17:31.812
I knew all that
practice would pay off.

01:17:55.969 --> 01:17:58.305
That's right,
you better fly away.

01:17:59.873 --> 01:18:03.410
Papa Drac, I'm
a vampire and a superhero.

01:18:03.477 --> 01:18:05.345
Am I cool now?

01:18:05.412 --> 01:18:08.915
"Now"?
Dennis, you were always cool.

01:18:08.982 --> 01:18:13.687
Human, vampire, unicorn,
you're perfect no matter what.

01:18:13.754 --> 01:18:17.057
But since I'm a vampire,
can we stay here?

01:18:17.924 --> 01:18:19.126
Yes.

01:18:19.192 --> 01:18:20.360
All right! Yeah!

01:18:20.427 --> 01:18:21.528
All right!

01:18:23.830 --> 01:18:27.901
But you have to know, we're going
to visit you here every holiday.

01:18:27.968 --> 01:18:29.970
That's fine.
That's fine.

01:18:39.446 --> 01:18:40.447
Aah!

01:18:45.752 --> 01:18:49.690
Don't ever come near
me or my family again.

01:18:53.193 --> 01:18:54.361
No!

01:19:03.537 --> 01:19:07.474
Daddy, you just
saved a human.

01:19:07.541 --> 01:19:09.876
All this pressure about

01:19:09.943 --> 01:19:12.312
when the boy's
fangs were coming out.

01:19:12.379 --> 01:19:15.649
Who cares? Mine came
out years ago! Look.

01:19:17.751 --> 01:19:20.721
Okay, Dad, put 'em back
in before we all barf.

01:19:20.787 --> 01:19:24.391
Hey! Isn't it still
somebody's birthday?

01:20:20.547 --> 01:20:22.048
Let me hear you sing!

01:20:24.184 --> 01:20:25.519
I didn't do that.

01:20:25.543 --> 01:20:36.543
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